So, let's start with the awkward and get that out of the way, because it's pretty awkward. I feel awkward just thinking about it.
I'm at Walmart (first mistake) on Saturday printing off pictures to frame for my new room. (I'll show you as soon as I have them hung.) I've just waited almost an hour for my "instant" prints, because they failed to put "broken" signs on two of the machines. Then I get to the checkout stand and this nice, old lady gives me an awkward smile. I say hello and ask her how she's doing. She says okay. Oh. I tried to talk to her a bit, but I didn't get anything back. Then a girl about my age comes up and puts her stuff on the conveyer belt - the checkout lady shot a major glare at this girl, and the girl asked, "Oh, I'm sorry. Are you not open?" The older woman replied, "Well, I've been waiting about an hour to go to the bathroom. I'm old, and I have diharrea and gas. Sorry. Sometimes you just can't hold it, so I have to go now." Exact. Words.
*Insert cricket chirp here...*
The other girl and I looked at each other, I smiled at the checkout lady, took my bag and said, "Have a nice day!"
Blue Note Jazz Club in NYC.