Traffic School

Yep.

You've got it. This post is dedicated to all of my fellow traffic schoolers. I don't know if you have ever had to sit through traffic school, but I did for the first time tonight.

I had been warned, by the few I actually told I got a ticket, that traffic school is like, well, you know what. I heard reports of this large and impersonal therapy group lasting four to eight hours. Bah, seriously?

Side story: As I was trying to find the correct building, I followed another girl a few steps and asked her if she was heading to traffic school. I was trying to find a "friend" by whom I could sit and, you know, not feel so lame. She looked at me with a totally emotionless and kind of scary face and said, "Finger prints." Oooookay! Sorry sister. You just go get your fingers printed and I will go get traffic schooled.

I finally found the correct building and room... it was a large dormitory filled with a lot of drivers. I felt comforted to know I wasn't the only one who was showing up for breaking the law.

I found a seat in the auditorium - not too close to the front, but close enough so the teacher would see me and know that I wasn't a "bad" driver. We all do it in our classes on campus too - some sit in the front; some sit on the side; some sit in the back. I usually sit front row, left or right side. Either way, I was there to pay attention. (Riiiight.) Then, the teacher walked out.

For any of you who have seen the Mad TV/ Youtube where the black guy is in the movie theatre and he sees the cute girl and he tries to "get her numba," you will hopefully understand the voice with which I say this sentence: "Oh okay! Okay! Uh huh! Okay!" (See video here.)

At this point, I didn't mind traffic school.

The officer was awesome. He said that this traffic school would last 1.5 hours and that he was going to make it funny. He wanted to review the laws for us but he didn't want to bore us to death. He proceeded to show us clip after clip to show us what not to do in driving.

And you know what, it worked. I feel like I have been through my own little "Alma the Younger" process, but for driving. I will never drive the same way. I learned a lot tonight. I saw some nasty crashes and realized that I do not want to put myself, or others, in those situations.

Did you know that, in the state of Utah, it is not illegal to change lanes in the middle of an intersection? Nope.

See? Look what you learn.

So... next time you get a ticket, I hope you get Officer Paul Jaunda for your traffic school teacher.

1. Please don't judge me for having to go to traffic school. Remember: karma.
2. No, I won't tell you what I was doing to deserve that ticket.